Media personality Ik Osakioduwa in a recent interview with Genevieve Magazine talked about love, his wife, his marriage and more.
See excerpts below.
On what love is: It is
patient, kind, and understanding but for me love has to be more than
that. It has to be consistent and dependable, it has to be 100 percent.
It can’t be seasonal or dependent on my behavior. Love loves you enough
to take you as you are but loves you too much to leave you as you are.
Love is a clear lucid moment’s decision that says I have got your back
no matter what. People lose their jobs and find it hard getting another;
will you stop loving them because they are out of cash? Love has to be
more than children. You can marry someone and never have kids. Love has
to be more than all the perks that make life enjoyable. People have had
accidents and have become vegetables. What then? Love is the constant.
It doesn’t vary no matter what. Anything short of that is likeness not
love.
On knowing his wife was “the one”:
I had a few relationships that didn’t work out, but the last girl I
dated before her couldn’t come to terms with my career prospects. This
was a time when entertainment wasn’t stable and people weren’t making
money. She couldn’t see a future in it so she advised me to get a bank
job. I just knew that she wasn’t for me and at that moment I scanned
through my life to see people that understood me and never tried to
change me. She was clearly the one who encouraged me to be what I wanted
to be and I thought to myself, that’s who I want to be with. She was
always there so it was a clear decision for me and luckily for me, she
is very pretty.
On approaching her: We
were friends for 7 years before we ever started dating. I told her I
wanted to marry her before we started dating. I am not one of those guys
that does intimacy without commitment (IWC) I would not date a girl for
seven years like she is a postgraduate degree. Even though she was
seeing someone else at the time, I told her “See I’ve known the most
important things I need to know about you, we are great friends and I
think you and I can be friends for the rest of our lives”. Note to boys
out there, the girl does not have to be single to toast her. If the boy
she is dating has not put a ring on her finger, she is fair game for
anyone to toast. Eventually she broke up with him and she wanted to give
it another six months to make sure it wasn’t a rebound relationship but
I waited because I knew I was there for the long haul. 6 months was
nothing; I was ready to be there for life.
On why men are not committing:
Nobody requires commitment of men anymore. Why did guys commit in the
past? Because it was required that at a certain age a man would do the
right thing and settle down. His parents required it and it was required
by his job to present a formidable front. Certain jobs in the past
wouldn’t consider a single man as M.D because unmarried men were
considered irresponsible. Women would rarely sleep with you talk less of
become your babymama without getting married to them. It was taboo, but
this generation permits everything.
On being a traditional male provider:
I used to tell my wife that my vision is way too big to be intimidated
by anything she could ever dream of. If she wanted to own a country,
that’s alright because I’ll own continents. Her owning a country does
not intimidate me because I was brought up to buy continents in order to
give her the country she wants. I was brought up to know that a guy
should be responsible for his family. I am very traditional and I
believe I should do the business of running the family. This is probably
going to offend readers but if the husband and wife have to depend on
both their salaries to run the family, then they are living above their
means. A woman’s money is welcome to the progress and wellbeing of the
family but if she is not allowed to quit her job because her money is
part of the school fees and rent, then they are living above their
means. A woman should reserve the right to quit her job to care for her
kids because in this day, stay-at-home mums are the biggest heroes out
there. My wife earns a lot of money but I pay the bills because that is
how I was brought up. Her money is to buy the Louboutin shoes that I may
not be able to afford in the midst of paying the bills. She can
contribute to the bills but I would never require it of her. Guys should
step up and deliver their responsibilities and stop requiring half from
the woman.
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